You’re Just Too Happy For Me

I may not have the most positive outlook on life. There is no future career in motivational speaking for me (or marketing.) To contrast, I am not the most melancholic person either. I tend to drift to the more cynical side of the spectrum. Lately I have been doing a bit of emotional/psychological self-discovery and while I haven’t reached the point of depression, I would like to share some recurring personality types I find I do not mix well with.

I am sure all of us can think of one person who fits into the category of an extremist, either in history, at work, school, or perhaps in your own circle of friends. These strong personalities are either hated or loved by those they surround themselves with, such should be implied by the very definition of extremist. I find it next to impossible to befriend someone with views so strong on both ends of the positive/negative spectrum. Nobody enjoys the company of a negative Nancy. It is possible to have a handful of conversations with them, but the saturation point is easily met well at the beginning of a relationship. I will try my best and make a few attempts at acquainting with someone (everyone deserves a chance) but I have my limits. The same can be said for those on the other end of the figurative field of emotions. The Oprah’s of the world can be just as much of an emotional damper as the Nancy’s (I mean no disrespect to those named Nancy out there. My step-mom is named Nancy and she is a very nice and understanding person.)

Lately I have had to deal with a lot of Oprah’s both directly and indirectly. I (as I imagine you as well) can think of someone who fits into this category. They’re the ones filling your news feed with motivational quote after quote so much so that it tends to have the opposite effect after so long. Maybe it’s the redundancy of the same messages being said that beats this figurative horse to the ground (phrases like, “I’m good” “Have a nice day” “Merry Christmas” and “That’s great” or “That’s cool.” Yes the Oprah’s like to think they are making a positive change in someone’s life but if I had to guess what their flaw in this approach is, it would be the timing. There is a certain time in someone’s life where they are willing to accept advice from those around them and only require so much at a time. I am finding that the same goes for any type of message one hopes to pass on. Just because you are trying to share a positive experience, does not mean it will be received well, or to it’s full potential.

This may seem depressing for some, but I start to get sick to my stomach when I hear terms such as, “blessed,” “grace,” and “gifted” in certain contexts.  I’m not much of a believer when I hear others mention that hopes, best wishes, and prayers are reaching someone in a particular instance. I’m not saying that this is wrong in any stretch of the imagination. I just want to assure those around me that you will be never receiving any requests for condolences or best wishes by me. Like I mentioned before, I am no motivational speaker or marketer on both physical and emotional products. Little anecdotes such as these leave me thinking and saying,

“You’re just too happy for me.”

I don’t think this is some defense mechanism to justify jealousy. It comes from a combination of repetition, imbalance, and a type of emotional marketing that doesn’t sit well with me. This would explain my general apprehension towards photos (both taking and receiving.) You can count me out of the selfie crowd. The few things I will not hesitate to capture with a photo are my significant other and my bike. To quote rule four of the rules of the Velominati, “It is, absolutely, without question, unequivocally, about the bike. Anyone who says otherwise is obviously atwatwaffle.” I need a little bit of evil in my life to balance out the positivity (one could argue more evil than most.) As much as I enjoy living in southern California, deep down I long for a rainy day in between the other 90% sunshine we have, on both a literal and figurative level.

-dfj

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