High Noise Low Output

The adrenaline has worn off, the pain has begun, and the healing can begin

If you have experienced the joys of cycling for a few hours or your entire life, you know that after an injury the only question that circles in your mind (unlike any normal human being) is, “How soon until I can get back on the bike?”It has only been a day and I am desperately trying to figure out how soon I can get back to riding, and the overall health of my bike. Its currently at the shop due to some frame damage and while there are a few options to solve this issue, I am left in the waiting room hoping for a speedy recovery (for my bike and myself.) I would be lying if I said the absence of something I have spent so much time with feels like a member of the family is missing. The empty space that is left in my room makes the room that much colder and lonely. I cannot imagine what I would be up to if I didn’t have a backup track bike to ride around. This limits me to the type of riding I am able to do, but you won’t get any complaints out of me (the velodrome is all of three miles from my house.)

While I technically haven’t taken an entire day off the bike (I ran a few errands to buy more bandages and tape) I will continue with my upcoming weekend plans of attending a few concerts.Tonight I go to see one of the bands I used to listen to in high school when I thought I wanted to become a musician. Norma Jean, a melodic and groove-inspired heavy rock band will be playing at one of the tiny local venues I used to wonder in during my high school years. One of the main reasons I decided to go aside from remembering their sound, and the fact that I get giddy when I hear about bigger bands playing at hole-in-the-wall venues, is to see how things have changed. There is no doubt in my mind that I have changed on many different facets since I was listening to music with double bass breakdowns and gnarly screaming. After flying from that nest I can say that I can appreciate and enjoy that same distorted sound, but am unable to listen to it as often as I used to.

Every few years of my life I like to reflect back on the person I was then, and the person I am today. Most of the time this is overwhelmingly uncomfortable after the first five minutes of reflection. But like me deciding to go back and attend the party-ride scene once more to see how things have changed, I too will have the same motives tonight. Part of me wants to observe the teenagers in this environment (such as I have) to see how they behave and to secretly geek out on whether I too was that pretentious, naive, and not well spoken. It is going to take some courage to look into this and not strongly consider I too was like this at one point in time. It’s kinda like not being able to listen to your own voice because you’re certain you will find a quality you don’t like, only it’s a lifestyle you used to live and were convinced this is going to be the way things are for the rest of your life. There might be a slight change that I will have something in common with these kids outside of the band and similar bands like them, but there is a better chance I’ll catch something in them that I might get nostalgic on in a melancholic way.

The voice inside my head: “Oh look at that, I can remember when I was excited to graduate high school and have big plans for the future. I remember when I had multiple options that I was stoked about.”

There is something about seeing young ambition that turns the cynical gears in my head. Call it what you want, the way I see it, when you talk to a teen approaching the end of their high school career, you may as well be witnessing a bird begin to leave the nest in their first attempts at flight. There are some that do well and leave the nest soaring. The realist (pessimist) in me favors the other end of the spectrum. I don’t wish this type of fate on to others. I see there being a more likely chance of the second and less glorious outcome. It’s going to be hard not to play the older guy thats, ‘seen some things’ and ‘been around the block a few times’ to come out and give unwanted unsolicited advice to others. Must keep to my own thoughts and try and learn as music as possible as I can from the youth. Not to learn the new slang and fashions, but to see how far off my views of the world were from what I can come to learn today.

On another note….

There will be a former pro cyclist appearing at our new shop to promote his new ( and incredibly attractive, in a slightly ridiculous, over-the-top, eurotrash sense) line of bicycles. I cannot say I am as excited to see him as those who are old enough to have seen him when he was still racing. The time gap inhibits my ability to formulate an opinion and relationship with the rider. I haven’t been able to find some text that represents his life, or a decent biography thats in english. Thank goodness this isn’t a ticketed event. What insignificant amount of respect I did have for him would have been diminished in a heartbeat.

Enter Shikari had a lot to say in an article  about people charging others money to be near that person (summarized as prostitution with a veil of marketing terms in hopes to fool the masses.)

So that’s whats on tonight’s agenda. After running errands both on the bike and in the car, I am tired to crawling in and out of my car with neck cramps and having to deal with the traffic in a way that doesn’t provide any type of advantage. If anyone would like to see me, I’ll be the older guy at the concert with earplugs, avoiding the youngsters who insist on throwing punches and kicks at the air in an attempt to alleviate their angst while wearing clothes that don’t fit and makeup that is best suited for end of the year holidays. (Thank god I never made it to the makeup wearing, nail polish wearing step of things. -sigh-)

-dfj

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