Open Up

Comfort hinders progress….

In my experiences with friendships in and out of the intimate setting, I have come across many different personality types. I have many resources to be thankful for. If I hadn’t discovered cycling or public radio, my horizons would be narrower than most. I’ve acquainted with people in different stages in life, and personal development. I know people trying to get their lives back in order, and others who can say with confidence that they’ve lived great and successful lives. I’d like to touch on those who have tasted success more than once and some of the conditions that aroused that behavior.

One trend I have come across is these special individuals have gone through  life experiences that have been less than pleasant. They have been put in sink-or-swim circumstances and have had the option to put things on the back burner taken away from them. I’m not implying that we all need our backs against the wall to achieve success in whatever it is we set our minds to, I’m simply pointing out an observational trend.

Whether it’s bringing a child into the world, quitting your stable job for a riskier career opportunity, incarceration, or finally moving out of the house, these are all examples of life events that are life changing. These truly test one’s character and are landmarks to the next phase in our lives. Those who possess genuine drive will at the very least learn from their mistakes if the wrong choice is made. I believe it is life changing experiences such as these that shape us into better human beings.

For example, up until recently, I’ve been living with my folks for all my life. These past few months have made me financially comfortable, and in a stagnant state of progression into adulthood. I didn’t even want to move out at my age. While most of my peers are making that transition, I was content (to a certain degree) at living with five other family members in a loud household.

This recent change in perspective has sparked a new and clearer way of thinking. In between the cleaning and packing, I’ve come to realize what is important for physical, mental, and emotional growth. To start with the physical growth, I’ve come to realize until you have accepted a routine of completely depleting yourself to the point of openly admitting that the past weekend’s events are the most difficult thing you have done thus far, and rebuilding yourself through rest on a frequent basis, real progress can be made. It’s a matter of getting out of that comfort bubble and exposing your body to a vulnerable state. If you allow your body to do what it needs to do to maintain that homeostatic balance, then progress can be made.

On a mental standpoint, all of the ideas I have mentioned from the book I just recently finished put things into perspective. If we are not willing to take a look inside ourselves and attempt to connect the dots as to why we behave in such an awkward and quite way in social settings, then we are bound to keep that synthetic bubble of contentment alive and well. At that point, you should consider why you would even leave the house in the first place. If you believe that you have what it takes to maintain a lifestyle that is free from others interfering from what you wish to experience, then form my own experiences, you are headed towards a dark and neurotic way of life. On a lighter note, if you choose to accept that you may or may not get hurt if you open yourself up to others in hopes of getting what you innately seek from someone else, you can grow as an individual on a tremendous level. Tell that person at work or the grocery store how you feel. Take a second to actively listen to what someone is trying to tell you. Don’t be afraid to share your feelings with others no matter how exposed you may feel. You’ll feel better once all is said and done.

The emotional concept ties in with the mental growth. There is this lingering social standard to save the heart-felt emotions for when someone is behind closed doors. This is a harmful behavior that needs to be changed. Why is it socially unacceptable among most of us to share a more sensitive side of ourselves to others? Sure, you may not get hurt if you keep your guard up day after day. Can you say you’re living a genuine experience after you’ve made this commitment? My educational experience was set to the tune of this idea. You were considered inferior because you showed a side of yourself that linked your personality to that of other (at the time, it was considered) inferior genders ( I think you get the point.)

Age has lead to so many new discoveries and assurances that the feeling you felt as a younger human being were perfectly normal and should be expanded upon, rather than kept inside and regressed from once stumbled on once again. But before I get sidetracked and thrown off my main point, I would like to reiterate that I am becoming more and more convinced that growth stems from vulnerability. On a social level, the more you expose yourself to the option of failure, (based on your character) the better (or worse) your chances are at success. You can probably connect the dots and figure out that I will begin this next phase of my life in such a way. Saying I am excited is an understatement. There is only so much I can speculate before I arrive on this philosophical and imaginary cloud of hopes and wishes. Until next time….



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